brokenxbeauty

Rachel Nicole

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Tweak by brokenxbeauty, literature

Flawed by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Flawed

Insecurities. Screaming at me, haunting me, clawing at every inch of my body. That little voice inside my head sounding strangely like my own, tearing me down, apart, from the inside. Each hate-filled blow, hits harder than the last. Each self-inflicted cut, each burn, hidden in shame, nonexistent to the piercing eyes of others, visible only in that lonely mirror reflection. Puffy eyes, tear-stained cheeks, little dotted lines drawn over every flawed bit of me. Not pretty enough, talented enough, smart enough, good enough. There is not a perfect inch within my being. Why can't I be beautiful?

INSOMNIA by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

INSOMNIA

a young girl yawns, darkness falls. her thoughts still racing. she slips under the covers. her head hits the pillow. her thoughts still racing. she squeezes her eyes shut, tries to play herself a lullaby. her thoughts still racing. she lays in bed for hours, no closer to sleep. her thoughts still racing. she clears every thought from her mind, they all come flooding back. her thoughts still racing. a young girl yawns, dawn breaks. her thoughts still racing.

sophmore slump by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

sophmore slump

i lost my drive for achievement, i've misplaced my will for success, i can't bring myself to try harder, i'm really becoming a mess. i'm in too deep, a little too late, though i still care, i'll just sit and wait. i'm destroying my world, i've let you down, i'm a disappointment, in my imperfections i drown. i have no drive to try, i've pretty much given up hope, i have no reason to change this, i don't know how to cope.

Stone Heart by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Stone Heart

The stone wall is peaking, Making it's rise to the top. I try not to think about us often, I've simply put my heart on stop. When people look at me, All that pity in their eyes, I stare back with my fake contempt, Causing them to step back in surprise. They say I take things quite well, They think I'm doing just fine, But truth is, I'm not taking it at all, although deep down I've lost my shine. I had this gut feeling from the start, That I would end up broken, But an idea called love got in the way, Now on bitter tears I'm chokin'. In my imagination you were different, You were just the boy of my dreams, But reality kicked

'Best Friend' by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

'Best Friend'

You left me here, alone in the cold. I can almost see the wind blow. It brings back memories, memories of you. The way you used to smile, you know, back we were two. three musketeers minus one, "best friends". The warth of your hug, and those silly jokes you told, while trying to cheer me up, force one smile out of me. I opened up to you, telling you everything. & now thinking back I realize... you told me nothing. Nothing worth knowing, anyway. Whatever happened? Did you just get bored? I'm not always cheery, not always interesting, but I thought best friends was more than that. Maybe I was too eager, eager to believe I fi

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Tweak by brokenxbeauty, literature

Flawed by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Flawed

Escape by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Escape

I'm trying to escape, trying to get away, trying to ignore what they do, forget about what they say. No move I ever make, can ever be one right, every simple thing I say, always starts a fight. I'm sorry I'm not perfect, the way I'm supposed to be, the thing is your slowly killing me, why can't you see? I'd really like to run away, where someone would understand, to someone who could see my pain, and gently take my hand.

Silent Killer. by brokenxbeauty, literature

Is It Love? by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Is It Love?

If I hugged you, would you never let go? If I kissed you, would you cherish that moment? If I reached for your hand, would you take mine gently? If I needed a shoulder, would you let me cry on yours? If I needed to talk, would you really listen? If I needed to scream, would you do it with me? If I needed to go, would you come with me? If I fell for you, would you catch me? or just let me hit the pavement?

A Beautiful - Terrible Scene by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

A Beautiful - Terrible Scene

You are in a vast forest. You walk into a big clearing, a meadow. Soft, lush, green grass is growing with little clumps of tiny yellow flowers here and there. The meadow is very big and is surrounded by trees on all sides, but one. In the distance you see something glisten in the sun and run towards it. It’s a lake, filled with clear, blue, glistening water, not that deep. At the bottom you can see the white sand and little fish swimming. Around the lake are cherry, peach, and apple trees, ripe and sweet-smelling, in full bloom. You pull a peach off of one of the trees and bite into it, tasting it’s sweet juices. You look up

Sorry. by brokenxbeauty, literature

I Changed by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

I Changed

Trying to cover the tears, trying not to show my fears. Why do I keep it all inside? My pain getting harder to hide. I used to be cheery, it used to be real. But now it's different, and they're making some big deal. Saying "Why are you so sad?" and "You look depressed." Can't you just leave me alone, let it rest? So maybe I've changed...what's that got to do with you? Just because I've changed? Well maybe you have too. Everyone changes.

Suicide After Death by brokenxbeauty, literature

Hey, Pretty Girl by brokenxbeauty, literature

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Caitlyn by MisfitableGrae, literature

Literature

Caitlyn

It's the little things I know about Caitlyn Cameron. She never tells anyone the big things. Once, Caitlyn Cameron broke in front of me. She leaned against the dirty bathroom stall And clutched herself, like it was all that held her Together. "My sister cut herself last night." And the one time Caitlyn Cameron trusted someone Enough to see her break That someone could not help her. Sometimes when it rains, Caitlyn Cameron will stand out in the water And ask God why she wasn't good enough. She says it feels good to blame someone for her cut-off angel wings. She can still feel them desperately trying to take her some place better.

lights like it's god by MisfitableGrae, literature

Literature

lights like it's god

she wants her veins to be bigger so they can hug the room when it starts spinning. she wants a time machine and more storms. she doesn't want an 'It's Gonna Be Okay'. she wants an end. except i'm not sure i know what you want anymore, sister. i think you want to sleep it away. i think you want to stop the yelling. i surrounded our old childhood playground with real world problems, sister. then doused it in too-expensive gasoline and lit the whole damn thing on fire so no one can touch those ours my memories. is that what you want? memories from the days when your problems were so simple you didn't need a knife or needle to so

the most honest poem i've ever written by MisfitableGrae, literature

Literature

the most honest poem i've ever written

I keep a bible by my bed and tell myself One day, I'll read it. I'm that jigsaw puzzle your grandmother gives you That you never really wanted. I'm a shipwreck you just know will happen, and yet You're still standing on the shore, waving Good-bye to your loved ones. I like rain and you and breathing And only one of those is optional. I think horrible things are funny, and cry when I lose something I thought I'd have forever. For what it's worth, I can't Imagine next year without you And I've always wanted a friend with ground eyes 'Cause I've spent too long in the sky, I'm sick of 'flying'. If I had a god, I'd call her Mom.

Dinah: Daisy Petals by deng-li-xin32, literature

Literature

Dinah: Daisy Petals

imagine: you're fifteen sitting by the roadside plucking daisies waiting for love to come along & there he comes a man (the man of your dreams?) & talks to you nice nicer than the brothers back home he talks like you're a woman not just the baby sister he talks like you're worth something not just there to be teased can you blame me? i went with him i thought, why not? he looked good enough he seemed kind enough i wanted to believe him even when he hurt me i wanted him to love me i wanted to be loved can you blame me? my brothers didn't they blamed him i wish they'd blamed me i wish they'd listened to my story bu

A Slow Drive through Yosemite by livingbyair, literature

Literature

A Slow Drive through Yosemite

Why people mix stimulants with depressants I don't know, but it's appealing when you pull out your flask and top off your coffee. You always said milk was a poor substitute when you could pour 90 proof and start your day off on a foot you forgot you had. You'd never set foot in a coffeehouse though. No, those feet were preserved for sticking out windows while your knees made an easel on which you'd rest some admixture of hand and canvass. "Drink and drive," you'd say, "It's okay," because it made you see the Fall trees like a cluster of red and purple paintbrushes pushing up from a cupped valley. And you knew I always wanted to paint like

Hold On To Your Heart by AngeliqueRaindrops, journal

Hold On To Your Heart

Feb 15, 2011

:heart: Time to dig out all of the love. Spread it. :dalove: ~spotlightplz (https://www.deviantart.com/spotlightplz) -For The Longest Time-Billy Joel :thumb25906861: :music:If you said goodbye to me tonight there would still be music left to write/what else could I do:music: :thumb154840101: :thumb196653061: :thumb182781304: :music:I'm so inspired by you that hasn't happened for the longest time:music: :thumb193073257: :thumb194592661: :music:Once I thought my innocence was gone now I know that happiness goes on that's where you found me:music: :thumb151774097: :thumb193533386: :thumb87694457: :music:When you put your arms around me I haven't been there for the lon

. by shecanread, literature

Deviation Spotlight

Oh, Beautiful Girl by brokenxbeauty, literature

Literature

Oh, Beautiful Girl

her beauty, shines as bright as a star. glows palely in the moonlight. burns radiant in the sunshine. her eyes, soft and sensual, like a mother's touch. big and green, pretty like money. the key to her heart, mind, and soul. her lips, as smooth as cocoa butter. juicy as a ripe red apple. longing to feel a lover's kiss. her heart, cold like a winter frost. lonely like a high school geek. cracked like a broken record. her mind, deep like the ocean blue. sharp like a razorblade. wandering like a lost soul. her body, petite like a china doll. her skin a milky white. warm to the touch, like fire. her soul, torn like a ri

Oh, Beautiful Girl

brokenxbeauty

About brokenxbeauty

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Artist // Student

United States
Deviant for 18 years
She / Her

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My Bio

22-year-old journalism major, English minor from USA.
studying abroad this semester (Spring 2014) in Norway.
I'm trying to get back in touch with my creative side.
I love reading, writing, sketching, photos, crafts and DIY, fishing, travel & camping.

Favourite Movies

Dead Poets Society, anything Disney

Favourite TV Shows

Sons of Anarchy, The Walking Dead, Teen Mom

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brokenxbeauty

Jan 25, 2014

Promise.

0 min read

I promised myself I'd work on my writing, so I promised myself I'd write something this weekend. Going for a hike today, we'll see if that inspires something decent from me on Sunday/Monday. Here goes nothin'... :)

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brokenxbeauty

Mar 26, 2012

To all who love and hate me..

0 min read

I posted all of this work in 2006, with no idea or hopes that anyone would ever be able to enjoy my writing. I hoped for critique and self improvement. I hoped to find that I was not alone on the emotional rollercoaster of life. I wrote these poems in middle school and early high school years to express the depression and feeling utterly lost that I was experiencing. Many have similar feelings growing up. I hadn't logged into the site for years, when one day I was bored and I did. Only to find out that my "Is it love?" had blown up - been favorited and commented on more times than I ever thought possible. To everyone who has enjoyed my wor

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brokenxbeauty

Sep 12, 2008

Photography class

0 min read

I'm taking a photography class this year, and so far, I love it! We're using these old cameras, processing black and white, and well, I'm learning a lot. (: I'm really excited and we started making our first prints today. I've made one so far, so I'll probably be posting lots of photos this year! Also, I think I'll be posting a lot of makeup photos, as I'm planning to attend a cosmetology school when I graduate. And well, I love playing with makeup. Can't wait to get some new stuff up!

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Profile Comments 134

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kirakk2

Apr 5, 2020

Are you still writing? I have read every poem and story of yours but the world would be so lucky to hear more art from the best author I know. You inspire me more than I thought any writer could!

28maym

Dec 5, 2018

Your writing is very enthralling..!
On another point, if I could be so rude as to bother you with a survey I made about deviantart and I'm trying to get it to as many different people on deviantart so I can get into a large variety of opinions and artists. If you could take it or even post a journal about it I would be eternally grateful! Thank you for your time, have a nice day!
docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAI…